Don't Eat The Toothpaste

As I've recently mentioned, Joshua isn't satisfied with our unreasonable demand that he stay in his own room at night like every other member of our household.  Tonight he again came out of his room, and he decided to explore the craft closet, which is in the small hallway between his and Clara's room.  He made a small mess, but nothing too bad.  But we also keep some spare toothpaste in there, and he reported to us that he drank some.  I found a tiny tube that was mostly consumed and was disappointed to see that it had fluoride in it.  Fluoride is toxic, which is why toothpaste for kids is often fluoride-free, as their little bodies are more susceptible: Half a full-sized tube of regular toothpaste can kill a child.  It was a 0.75 oz tube (a trial size), and he'd only had about 80% of it, but we decided to call Poison Control to be safe.  The lady who answered asked some questions and then told me to give him two Tums and some milk and watch him for an hour, and she'd then call back.  I thought that was a little much for how little he consumed, but I also figured getting sued isn't something she has a strong interest in, so she probably errs on the side of caution.  Here Joshua tiredly drinks his milk while we were hanging out waiting for the hour to pass.  He seemed fine and said his tummy didn't hurt.  When the lady called back I told her he was fine and that I was glad it was only a 0.75 oz tube.  She seemed surprised and said she thought I'd said it was a small 3 oz tube (which I definitely didn't), and said, "Oh, I'm sure he's fine then!"  Yes, I'm sure he is, but maybe improve your listening skills for the future, lady.  There are only two parts of your job: 1. Listen to the scenario.  2. Dispense advice accordingly.  If you're a little shaky on #1, maybe find a new line of work, or you're going to get stuck in the opposite scenario ("Oh, you said he ate 3 tubes of toothpaste?  I thought you said 3 ounces!") and that lawsuit you were hoping to avoid is going to be a sudden reality.  Either way, Joshua is fine, but we've now moved all toothpaste out of that closet.